Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came

May 4, 2017

I only read the first book (I think the second is on my shelf), this is a lot more Last Action Hero than I was expecting, though this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, Matt Colville sums up my feelings pretty well:


May 2, 2017

I saw Vol 2 last night and was not disappointed. Once again, Drax steals the show (I think my favourite line of his is still from Vol 1, “Nothing goes over my head. My reflexes are too fast. I would catch it.” But there are still many many actualols.)

It’s nice that Yondu gets a decent arc, and I wasn’t sure what Nebula would be up to but glad she was there too. The Stan Lee cameo might be my favourite one yet.

As with many comic book movies the finale becomes a bit of a CGI slugfest* but it’s still fun, funny, and dramatic enough to hold your attention.

A good measure of a comic book film is whether or not Sarah genuinely enjoys it or whether she’s humouring me. The first Guardians is the only one we saw together twice in the cinema, and I think we’d both see this again. Also the soundtrack is, predictably, great. I think the only thing I was disappointed by was the lack of a Ragnarok trailer before the movie.

Stray things that made me smile (spoilers I guess):

  • Uatu!
  • Howard the Duck!
  • Zardu Hasslefrau
  • Yondu’s face during the 700 bounces
  • Drax’s turd brag
  • “You look like Mary Poppins!” “Was he cool?” … “Yeah he was cool”
  • Adam Warlock (almost!)
  • “The skin is the same level of thickness from the inside as from the outside!”
  • Jeff Goldblum’s blink-and-you’ll-miss-it credits Grandmaster cameo
  • Teen Groot!

* I actually thought the first film handled this pretty well, I don’t mind a big space battle and the actual final ‘fight’ with Ronan managed to largely avoid this


April 11, 2017

I enjoyed the first two Thor films. Admittedly on second viewings they weren’t quite as great as I remembered them but still watchable. I enjoyed seeing Asgard, Vanaheim, the Aesir and Vanir up on the big screen but the plots were never quite the Shakespearean tragedies they were perhaps meant to be.

Ragnarok is looking like an altogether different prospect.

I’ve been tentatively excited about this since Taika Waititi was announced as director. My excitement is no longer tentative. His work is funny, charming, well observed, and not afraid to be strange and this trailer is hitting all the right notes.

I want nothing more than to see Thor exploring strange parts of a weird universe populated by the cast of a Star Wars/Flash Gordon mash-up universe cracking jokes while Led Zeppelin blares out.

November feels a long way off (even with the plethora of superhero films coming out between now and then). To fill the gap you should (whether you’ve seen them already or not) watch What We Do In The Shadows and Hunt for the Wilderpeople.

Or for something a little more informative (though likely completely unrelated to the plot of the next Thor film) you could learn a little more about Ragnarok from everyone’s favourite Cowboy Viking.


November 24, 2016

And another trailer why not (certainly better than thinking too much about the real world).


November 24, 2016

I was already excited about this but now I’ve seen the trailer I just can’t get over how perfect Adam Driver looks as a Jesuit. It’s like he’s walked out of a painting.

My point is, I think Marsellus Wallace has at least one Silmaril

November 6, 2016

This is great.

But there are some flaws in the argument. Why would Brett – this random nerdy-looking Californian guy – have Marsellus’ soul? And how do you keep a soul in a briefcase?

A stronger theory would have to involve something else beautiful and glowing with inner light, which also impels people to seek it and even kill for it, which also provides supernatural protection to those who rightfully seek it, but which could fit in a briefcase and which a nerdy Californian might be uniquely skilled at knowing where to find.

My point is, I think Marsellus Wallace has at least one Silmaril.

I love love love theories like this (hi Darth Jar Jar!). As with all the best one so much of it falls neatly into making sense! Right?

One last issue: Tolkien’s elves are usually depicted as fair-skinned and lithe, whereas Marsellus Wallace is a really big black guy. Does this contradict the theory?

It would, unless Marsellus were under some kind of magical glamor to hide his true appearance. And there’s actually some evidence for this.