Cracking post on McSweeney’s. Some faves:
BRAS – Strapping. Supportive. Always near my boobs.
TV SETS – Modern. Always turned on. With a warranty.
BOOKS – Novel. Unpredictable. With a spine.
CARPETS – Stylish. Rugged. Lets me walk all over them.
WINE – Perfectly aged. On a case-by-case basis. In the cellar.
KEYBOARD – Silent type. Writes letters. Gives me space.
SUN – Hot. Punctual. Always goes down.