I’d forgotten what game adverts were like in the 90s. This is genuinely amazing.
The whole KS page is worth a read if you ever played a pirated FPS that required 5 floppy discs.
You survived the hell demons of DOOM, the pure evil of QUAKE and the insane Nazi regime of WOLFENSTEIN 3D. But nothing can prepare you for the depravity of deep space in STRAFE®.**
*The threat level STRAFE® poses to humanity is not currently quantifiable.
**Hardcore players only. Not recommended for children or elderly.
***If STRAFE® does melt your CPU, please send us a picture of the damage, so we can post it on Twitter. @STRAFEGAME
****STRAFE® will not literally kill you. Most likely. If by coincidence death does occur during a STRAFE® session, number one, what better way to go out, and two, we do not accept liability or responsibility. If you’re worried about the effects of hardcore gaming on your health, we encourage you to consider our $10,000 reward tier.
*****No.
******Developing STRAFE® is a greater accomplishment, but that is not an accessible goal for you.